MY VERY SPECIAL MOM

MY VERY SPECIAL MOM

I just booked a flight to see my mom on Mother’s Day weekend (May 2012). I realize that it is still several months away, yet I seem to get excited and thrilled about visiting my mom.  I am going to phone her right away to share my excitement with her.

"Hi mom, I just called to tell you that I will be visiting you in a couple of weeks”. “Oh great, are you coming alone”?  “Yes mom, I am coming on Mother’s Day weekend because you are my favorite mom”.  My mom laughs aloud and answers with,” that’s great because you only have one mother”. “Yes mom, and even if I had a few mom’s I promise that you would still be my favorite”. My mom then said " I love you".  I wasn't totally sure what I heard my mom say, so I asked her to repeat it. Mom then said, "I almost said I like you, except I really love you".  I answered with "wow mom you just melted my heart".

3 Years Ago

Most everyday that I speak to my mom she would ask me when I am coming over.  She says that she thought I would have visited her just the other day.  I try to explain to her that I live too far away.  Sometimes my mom tells me to take the bus or subway and does not comprehend how far I live.  Sometimes she says” oh I forgot you live so far away”.  I’m in New York and my mom is in Florida.  It gets me sad, that I cannot just get in my car or on the bus or the subway, as she suggests, and visit her for a couple of hours each day.   It seems to put a pang in my heart that she does not understand why I cannot visit her more often.

 I explain to my mom that I’ll be visiting again shortly.  Does time, weeks or days mean anything to her?  Not really, everything is just rolled into one day, one moment; one time for this is all she knows, and all that she is capable of remembering.

As usual, as I leave my mom, she has no memory of my visit.  Yet I know that I just saw her, and for me, at this moment, this is all that is important.  When I return this May (2012) from seeing my mom she will not remember.  Yet to me she is my mom, my very special mom and I wish to celebrate with her all the love I have for her.

 I so much cherish the times that we still have together.  Some days seem to better than others.  Alzheimer’s is such a strange disease, on the way that it comes and goes.  My mom and I are still able to share some smiles and joys together and I know that I must keep looking for the rainbow.  Yes, to me, she will always be, my very special mom.