Saturday, August 18, 2012

GLIMMERS OF A RAINBOW


GLIMMERS OF A RAINBOW

Sometimes when dark clouds start to clear, the sky opens up to glimmers of a rainbow . This is how my mom has been this week after the antibiotic she has been on started to work. Before we knew that she had a UTI infection, my mom appeared listless, only wanting to sleep her days away.

Not anymore. The sounds of her laughter and joy could certainly fill the size of a ballroom. Mom was reciting to me a rhyme that she recently made up. "Mister, Mister, where did you meet your sister". She said it over and over again, with much humor and expression in her voice. Each time that she repeated her new rhyme "Mister, Mister where did you meet your sister? we would both giggle as she rejoiced with her verses. She even had her caregiver Trudy, laughing hysterically in the background.

Just hearing the sound of her joy and happiness delighted me, sending thrills up and down my spine . She sounded so alive as if she was having an adrenaline rush, or maybe was about to run a marathon race . Either way the excitement that she showed brought a needed smile to my face and a lightness to my heart. The week before I knew that my mom was having a rather hard time.

Alzheimer's is such a strange disease and one that I do not understand. One day my mom can be lethargic, and the next day she can be dancing the night away. I never know how long these moments of aliveness can last. Nor do I really want to know. I just try to go with the flow of mom's ups and downs.

I wish that every day would be an up day for my mom. This I know is not possible. I find it hard to even imagine how in some ways my mom is so alive, yet in other ways there is not much that exists in her life.

Mom will be eighty eight years old at the end of this week. Except for having Alzheimer's and macular degeneration she is in rather good health. She never seems to complain about anything, and on her good days there is always joy and laughter that resonates from her being. The only thing that she will say to me is that she cannot remember much of anything.

Actually mom remembers very little of anything.  For me the most important thing is that she still remembers me. I know that this is a gift to be cherished. A gift that may one day be taken away. Yet today I choose to remain happy. Its almost like when I see the glimmers of rainbows forming in the sky. I see all the beauty and do not remember the storm that just passed by.



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