Monday, November 28, 2011



We all know how quickly our life goes by or at least we are suppose to.  Do we take some days and perhaps years for granted?  Do we take our family, loved ones sometimes for granted?  We all just celebrated another Thanksgiving holiday. Do we need the holiday to really get in touch with how lucky we may be? Why can't we just "own" this without having any holiday to remind us. 

It's funny how out of my mom's illness, that everyday that I still can have with her, I cherish it in a way that I never did before. For me did it take my mom getting Alzheimer's for me to realize how  lucky I am to have her as my mom and in my life everyday?  Now,every second that we still can share has become so precious to me.

My holiday was very special this year. I shared it with my son Logan,who is now 24 years old(see picture above) and my husband, my dear friend Leslie and then my cousin Carole and her three sons, their wives and 7 of her grandchildren. Unfortunately my bother lives in another state near my mom so we were not all together. Although in 10 days I will be back visiting my mom and brother after just visiting 8 weeks ago. Logan came with me on my last trip and now my husband Bert(mom's dancing partner) will be accompanying me on this visit.

My mom spent Thanksgiving with her caregivers family, which my mom now has no recollection of. Nor does she remember how, just a short time ago, we called her Mama Mia the Dancing Queen, for she loved to twirl my husband around while they danced. Yes, my mom Ruthie had to take over and lead the way. Now all these memories no matter how much she enjoyed them  have disappeared.  Yet her life and ours still goes on .The only difference now is that my mom has Alzheimer's and for her there is nothing left in her memory of her past and even her present.

The day after Thanksgiving I spoke to Elaine moms caregiver and she filled me in about how my mom was on Thanksgiving day. Ruthie of course just wanted to go home, which is something she does say even when she is with our family. Elaine kept telling her that Logan and my brother were coming so they had to stay and wait, and my mom who is still sharp replied" no they are not coming today. They are coming tomorrow". Ruthie tried to "catch" Elaine although she had no luck and spent the day with Elaine's family as they all sang Christmas Carol's. Ruthie of course joined in singing, and I was told how much she enjoyed herself. No my mom cannot remember to tell me anything about that day or any day in fact.  Yet she and I still can throw kisses and share our love each and every day.  

I know that my mom had a good time on Thanksgiving and enjoyed being out . I heard the cheerfulness and aliveness in her voice. For this I remain grateful and thankful and need no holiday to remind me of how lucky I am to still be with my mom ,no matter what "place" my mom now lives in.