Back to the present
This week after my mom and I had one of our many conversations, I hung up and wondered if she would have been as sweet as she is today, would I have also been as loving as I now am to her .
Today and each day that I speak to her I tell her how very much I love her, and how special she is to me. She always seems to thank me for what I just said . What would it have been like if I would have understood and loved her in the same way when I was a child? Would my mom have been as sweet and gentle with me as she is now? Would we have had an entirely different relationship? Was it me or was it both of us?
Why did it take my mom's illness for her to be able show how very sweet she is, and for me to love her as deeply as I do.
Can you only imagine how I now feel, when my mom thanks me, for all the kind words that I shower upon her. All that I am left to say is "mom if I didn't mean everything I just said, I would never say it".
I guess as the expression goes that it is never too late to fall in love, except this is not with a man this is with my own mother. My mother who in her later years of life, as she suffers from Alzheimer's has been able to shine with all the love she has to give. This lady who I use to fight with no longer exists.
For me there appears to be some silver lining behind this awful disease. Maybe my mom has no recollection of her past, and at times can be confused, yet the one thing she never seems to forget is to show me all her love.
My heart has opened up for her with such love and joy, that I can now celebrate each day that we have left. Alzheimer's is a tragic disease, yet in some strange way, it has returned to me my mom, the one I now call my hero.
Together we all need to spread and raise awareness about Alzheimer's.