Wednesday, August 3, 2011



One day back in June 2010, when I was asking my mom if she knew when my birthday was. Ruthie said she did not remember, so I rephrase my question and I said” okay when did you give birth to me?”  My mom answers me that she does not know, except that is not important. What matters she said is that she gave birth to me and I was healthy and alive.  My mom continues to say that I was really good baby (which I heard I wasn’t) and that she took good care of me.  She says that memories come and go and that is okay.  She touches me as usual and I tell her that I want to take her on the Dr. Phil show (since Oprah is gone) and she asks if he is still on TV.  I answer yes.  Mom says she doesn’t want to be on TV and I ask why not and she says she does not know.  So I tell my mom that I want to tell everyone about my relationship with her and how inspiring she is to me.  I want to share to everyone how my mom has blossomed into this beautiful flower.  She laughs and says, so are you!

When I hear that my mom does not remember her grandson calling her I know this is not good. The sun rises and sets on her only grandchild.  I tell my mom that Logan came over for us to meet his girlfriend.  Of course I tell her how nice she was.  This time my mom asks me nothing about Logan or his girlfriend.  She says nothing which is not like her.   Logan is the apple of my mom’s eye and I know that this would have a lot of meaning to her.  Her response, or no response had me realize again about her illness ,that today was not one of her better days.  

A few days later when my mom sounded great I mentioned again about Logan and that Bert & I met his girlfriend and this time her response was cheerful and sharp.  My mom asks how old she is and if she is cute.  I answer on both and I tell her that it was nice to see Logan being affectionate to her in front of us, by holding her hand.  My mom laughs and then says “that’s good because a lot of kids will not do that in front of their parents. “ Wow mom there you go again with your many insights and wisdoms about “life”.

My mom has asked me where I live which again I have told her several times.  I was born in New York and have lived here all my life.  I tell her I live on the East River so close that I could jump out my window and be in the river.  She tells me not to jump and we both laugh. Today she seems to be on speed, her adrenaline is going and she’s really talking up a storm.  She keeps singing and singing and changing the words to every song.  I tell her to keep practicing because I’m going to take her on some TV show.  She asks why ,and I say so she can be famous ,and that I want the world to meet her.  She says she’ll be dead before she’s ever famous.  She continues going on and on with one story after another. This has not happened in quite a while. What an imagination she has.  I listen and listen and finally after feeling a little guilty I tell her I need to get going, throwing her kisses and we hang up.

Telling my mom about writing a book I’ve have occasionally read her bits of it.  When I read her something that I don’t like the way it is written she tells me that if I don’t like it I can just throw it out.  She mentions that when I read to her and ask her opinion she feels flattered.  I then come across a word that seems to be spelt incorrectly and I ask Ruthie the spelling Queen how to spell the word.  She goes ahead and spells it and says that I should write the word down 3 times and it will eventually it will look correct.  Good thinking mom and thanks for the advice.  I will certainly try it.

I mention to my mom that Logan, who now lives in Manhattan like me, is moving across the river to Hoboken, New Jersey because his rent is getting to be too much. To this she replies that it is better that he is moving across the river, instead of in the river and we both laugh. She does have a great sense of humor and is quite quick with her answers.

Whenever my mom says something that I want to add to my book/blog, I tell her that my book is never going to end.  She asks why and I say with all your words of wisdom I just keep writing and writing what you say. Mom then says to me “so just go with it and if your story never ends it never ends.”  She tells me that I can’t stop it ,so I may as well go with it.  That’s my mom !

FACT- Alzheimer's disease cannot be slowed, prevented or cured.


  1. Just lovely Lisa, this really resonates with me!!...My Mum is very full of surprises, making up words, coming up with sharp inciteful comments, despite not knowing what I have said two minutes ago! She does not break into song but will do a 'little dance' when excited.. we also blow a lot of kisses to each other as a 'tradition'when I leave from a visit to her in her'Sunrise'. As ever, many thanks for all you do for Dementia Awareness raising and for just 'sharing''s inspiring, its important.Hugs, Heather(Pearson)xxxx,Hampshire,UK

  2. Great post. You are taking on the job of caregiving so much better than most. Better than me for sure. I have just now got to the point where I don't get mad anymore . At mom or me. I still get sad a lot but that is from the boredom and lonliness I feel most of the time. But I don't think with your great attitude you will ever have these moments.